APRIL 2021

After a two-week break, I’m feeling refreshed.  The weather is warming up, the cherry blossoms are blooming, and spring is in the air.

SONG INSPIRATION

This month’s blog is inspired by Regardless by Mansa from the Cannon Busters soundtrack composed by Bradley Denniston.

NEW SCHOOL YEAR

New school.  New year.  The Japanese school year runs April – March, separated by a 2-week break.  My new junior high school is closer to my apartment, more formal, and 2.5x larger than my previous school.  I expect to have frequent interactions with the four English teachers (my previous school only had 2) and more lessons.  My rotation of elementary schools remained the same, which is great because I’ve developed relationships with teachers and students there.  Unlike when I started in February, I’m much less anxious.  I know the expectations, protocols, and the city.  If anything, I’m more worried about the level of formality at my new school.  My previous school, due to its size and setting, was laxer than expected.  But it’s too early to judge.  I’ll have a better feel when I enter the classroom next week.

LIFE IN JAPAN

Spring has brought a new feeling an air, one of excitement after emerging from the sunny, but frigid winter.  The cherry blossoms are gorgeous.  The days are longer.  The weather is warmer.  With that comes a new perspective.  I continue to learn more about Japan and myself.  When you stare into Japan, Japan stares back at you O_O.  Seriously, I think this is a completely normal experience for anyone who has lived abroad, especially in a country whose language isn’t your mother tongue.

One of the issues I’ve thought about a lot is, no surprise, education.  I’ve reflected on how my perception of learning has evolved.  I used to be a stickler for performance (i.e., tests and grades), attendance, and obedience.  I was a judgmental brat about school, because when I was a student, I enjoyed learning and I expected everyone else to feel the same in that environment.  Flippant attitudes toward school infuriated me as a child.  Nowadays, I view childhood as a time for exploration and unbridled optimism.  Homework, grades, etc. are fine, but creating a space where children feel safe and supported is more important.  It’s hard for me to get upset about teenagers goofing off, because I know in the grand scheme of things those petty antics won’t matter.  And neither will the countless assignments and quizzes.  Instead, children will remember who protected them, who inspired them, and who treated them with respect.  There’s an irony in this realization, because I disdain children.

Enough philosophical rambling.  My point is that I’ve started to rethink how I approach education.  When I return to America, I plan to teach.  And although I’ll likely be teaching adults, I’ve started to think about how I want to structure my courses, what I want my students to gain from said courses, and what kind of educator I want to be.  One thing is certain – I won’t judge my students’ abilities by their grades or attendance.

What else is new on the anime archipelago?  Living abroad has been a crash course in solitude and isolation.  I haven’t spent this much time alone, with myself and my thoughts, in…ever.  This is my first time living alone.  And it’s the farthest I’ve ever lived from everyone I love.  My therapist suggested I lean into the loneliness and isolation.  Folks, it’s hard.  But he’s right.  Janet (Good Place reference) once said, Humans only live 80 years, and they spend so much of it just waiting for things to be over.  I don’t want to rush through this experience just because it’s hard at times.  Sometimes you have to lean into discomfort.  I know once this experience is over, I’ll miss it immediately.  And being alone – with your thoughts and emotions – teaches you a lot about yourself.  I’m learning so much about me.  A me in the absence of close friendships, family, romance, etc.  A me left to my own devices.  It’s a recipe for growth, but that doesn’t make it any less unpleasant at times.

WRITING

The creative juices gush from my fingertips.  Eww.  I’m continuing to make progress on my novel, with new characters and subplots sprouting along the way.  One of the cool things about writing is that even if you have a detailed plan – which I do – your story evolves as you write.  Your mind makes connections, your characters do interesting things, or you realize that something is missing right as you’re typing the scene.  The most important aspect is to just keep writing.  The first draft of my novel will be shit.  The second will be shite.  The third will be decent.  The fourth should be pretty damn good.  And when the final draft is finished – it’s over for you h*es.  I’m so ready to finish this book (and start my next one)!  With regards to science writing, my recently submitted paper is under review and I expect to start working on my next one in the coming weeks.  I’d like to submit another one before I….

RETURN TO AMERICA

Yes, that’s right.  I will be moving back to America late this summer.  I made the decision not to renew my contract.  Now, before you assume, let me assure you that Japan remains a wonderful place to live.  I continue to enjoy my day-to-day life.  If I found my dream job here (and transported some loved ones and whoadies from America), then I would be down to stay for a couple of years.  Unfortunately, I wasn’t given enough time to experience my job and develop a life here before being asked to renew my contract.  I just couldn’t make a decision about my life through summer 2022 with only 2 weeks of work experience (at the time).  So, I’m returning stateside.  What awaits me, I hope, is some much-needed downtime to recover from graduate school, finish my novel and publish my papers, and search for a career.  Let me be clear:  I’ve been burnt out for over 8 months.  I absolutely need a respite and what better way to close out 2021 and this pandemilovato.

CURRENT SHOWS

Recently finished:  Alien Worlds; Bob’s Burgers (s8-9); Borgen (s1-2); Cannon Busters; High Rise Invasion; Messiah; WandaVision

Currently watching:  Bob’s Burgers (s10); Borgen (s3); Plunderer

Thank you so much for reading!  My next blog is scheduled for Thursday, May 6^th.  Until next time, please stay safe.